Daily Ace Hangout – Day 2: Getting to know each other! 💜
https://redd.it/1q846cj
@asexualityonreddit

How do I know?

How do I know if I’m asexual or just all the research I’m doing/ the idea of being ace is getting into my head?

https://redd.it/1q7wp8i
@asexualityonreddit

Idk if I’m asexual.

So I was in a relationship for about a year and a half. In the beginning I really wanted to have sex with this person but my sex drive slowly turned to nothing. I never felt like starting anything but if he wanted to it was fine and it was still good but I have zero sex drive. Idk if I’m attracted to other people. I can look at them and know they’re attractive but I don’t know if I feel it in the same way everyone else would. Idk if there’s just something wrong with me because I WANT to have sex if it’s new and exciting but it’s like i quickly settle back into having no sex drive which is difficult in relationships. It just almost makes me feel dirty that i only want to have sex when it’s with someone new.

https://redd.it/1q7zcg9
@asexualityonreddit

Sex averse? Feeling physically nauseous and not interested in anything related.

FTM/29. For as long as I can remember, I’ve felt grossed out and nauseous when hearing about sex, talking about it, needing to skip scenes in tv-shows/movies, I felt uncomfortable being in changing rooms. The libido/urges/fantasies never happened to me and I only found guys aesthetically attractive (I thought that was what everyone else meant until yesterday).

A couple of years ago, I started testosterone/HRT and then my previously non-existing libido kicked in, which made me question if I am asexual at all. (I thought libido meant the same thing as ”sexual attraction”, but it’s not directed at anyone, it’s just there).

I tried to see if ”being with someone”, was my thing and in my opinion, it’s overhyped by people and by media.
>!I honestly don’t know if I can consent because I listened more to what the body (randomly) needed, because of the libido, than what my mind wanted. I said ”yes” because I pressured myself and thought that was ”consent” (I know about the laws of consent, but struggled to apply that to myself in the past and I made that choice).!<

I struggle with the libido emotionally (getting my T dosage/intervals adjusted) and
now I have learned to put myself first and learning to set boundaries if I’m not comfortable with something.

I tried to figure out if I’m in denial or if I actually am sex averse: if I feel disgusted about everything about sex most of the time, not wanting to ”do the daily libido chore”, enjoying it physically because that’s how the body reacts, and feeling grossed out again afterwards.
”Why did I need to do that? That was unnecessary.”

I looked up photos of bodies for the first time in my life to see if I got a sexual/physical reaction and…there is none, not even finding them beautiful. That felt good to know because I’m against sexualisation.
They’re just bodies.
No ”breasts! butt! hips! thighs!🤩”.

I guess this is the opposite problem of what people have:
My preference/orientation doesn’t bother me, I feel happy about it and I don’t feel that I’m missing out on anything (other than a queerplatonic/romantic relationship).
It’s only the libido that bothers me.




https://redd.it/1q871mk
@asexualityonreddit

ace-coded
https://redd.it/1q6j01m
@asexualityonreddit

What is your most random Ace-Adjascent (Ace, Aro, Gray...) Headcanon?
https://redd.it/1q89nqw
@asexualityonreddit

Going on a date, need some advice…

Someone I recently worked on a university project with asked me out on a date a little while ago. I (22F) am asexual but not aromantic and I said yes because I thought he was really nice and I had already kinda started to have romantic feelings.

The date is tomorrow afternoon and we are going to get coffee and visit the greenhouse :)🪴

I haven’t been on that many dates since figuring out I’m asexual so I’m not really sure how I should approach/handle the topic with him. Is this the kind of thing that I should definitely share on the first date? When should I tell him? I like him but I also don’t want to lead him on if me being ace ends up being a dealbreaker for him.

Any advice would be really appreciated! Thanks :)

https://redd.it/1q8alf0
@asexualityonreddit

Can I be asexual but still feel love?

I feel intense romantic attraction to people but actually pursuing a relationship ever really appealed to me mostly cuz I couldn't relate to the idea of physical intimacy. Recently met someone at my new workplace. They're so perfect and emotionally compatible it doesn't even feel real.

This person has made me feel safe in a way that just being in their presence feels like coming home. Hugging and kissing makes me feel butterflies. Despite it all, I'm still hesitant about the sex part. I just know this doesn't have anything to do with libido or trauma. I'm fully capable of experiencing arousal from fantasizing about it but I just don't want to do it irl. I feel like my brain doesn't associate sexual intimacy with romantic connection or love. I'd be much more at ease being in a relationship without the expectation of sex.


I've been trying to document all my feelings as I experience them but things keep getting more complicated. Sometimes I feel like I'm overanalysing everything. I'm in love with this person and I don't want to ruin this because of my confused feelings.

https://redd.it/1q8d38c
@asexualityonreddit

"WoMeN aLwAyS wAnT sEx"

Me: "I'm Asexual but still want a relationship"

Most men in my country: "Oh but women are always going to want sex eventually so you know if you can't provide that, they'll leave you..."

I am so SICK of hearing this exact sentence, ON REPEAT by almost every single Allo man in my country. Most recently by "My Dad"

And then "We're just being realistic" Fuck no you're not. Can't you GRASP that since Ace Men like me exist then Ace Women are also a thing, or are you all do BACKWARDS that you think women are these alien creatures who function on fucking... Mysterious magical sex drive that turns on once a month or something and is uncontrollable?????

They're human, we're human, why can't you dumbassess see that life is not just about sex.

Another guy told me "The main thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is sex" THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALLOS... I don't mean all allos but like most Straight, Allo seem like people are sex addicts based on these conclusions. And that would be a FUCKING insane world to live in.

Help me out here ace ladies and gents, because I am so sick of this backwards ass Allo mentality.


Not only is it incredibly backwards, but it's also so FUCKING DEMORALISING that they're essentially saying "You're Asexual so no woman will ever love you" They're not saying it, but that's what I'm hearing. And it HURTS.

https://redd.it/1q8dqf9
@asexualityonreddit

Realising the general public doesn't know what asexuality is

https://redd.it/1q8cukv
@asexualityonreddit

Aro Fest!

https://redd.it/1q8ib8d
@asexualityonreddit

I made a Sensual/Sensorial Spectrum Attraction Flag :D

https://redd.it/1q8f4uf
@asexualityonreddit

I noticed today that this was a better experience on a dating app, so I had to make into a meme.
https://redd.it/1q8klcw
@asexualityonreddit

Discovered something disturbing today

Apparently there is a sub completely dedicated to gate keeping the Asexuality label? And they use my ace hero Todd as their image? I’m sex adverse and have not sexual desire but I hate that there is a whole sub devoted to gatekeeping Asexuality for people with no desire. I knew the ‘attraction not action’ thing was kinda controversial but the existence of a whole sub makes me sad. It feels so immature. We are constantly gate kept from other LGBtQ spaces so you’d think we would do it to ourselves.

https://redd.it/1q8lech
@asexualityonreddit

3am thought
https://redd.it/1q8oanp
@asexualityonreddit

Did anyone else think they were Pan before they realized they were actually Ace?

When I was in Highschool I had initially assumed I was pansexual since, as far as I knew at the time, I considered people of every gender to be on the same level of attractiveness and having a relationship was an active choice.

It was later when I was in college that that consideration wasn't because I was pansexual, but because I was asexual and that romantic attraction and general indifference are two separate things and I have never felt the former.

So I'm curious, who else went from thinking they loved everyone regardless of gender to they don't actually care for anyone regardless of gender? I want to see how common it is for people to end up on the Pansexual to Asexual Pipeline.

https://redd.it/1q8noer
@asexualityonreddit

Daily Ace Hangout – Day 3: Where in the world are we? 🌍💜 ✨
https://redd.it/1q8o8mw
@asexualityonreddit

Tips?

I’m a 16 year old virgin girl who hasn’t even had my first kiss yet. I’ve been wondering if I’m asexual for a few months now and I’m really starting to feel like i am. Is there anyway I could subtlety hint to my parents about behind asexual. I find it hard to talk to them and they aren’t really…educated on sexual orientation. I’ve tried to tell my mom I didn’t think I was attracted to people sexually and that I felt different than all of my other classmates when they talk about sex, their experiences, and who they want to have sex with.

So could someone tell me subtle ways to hint to them that I could be ace without them lecturing me about how I’m “just scared” and “I need to just be more outgoing”? Thank u!! 💖

https://redd.it/1q8t3ag
@asexualityonreddit

Does anyone else like to play as aroace characters in games?

(I have no idea what tag to use)

I'm not particularly aromantic but I never liked romancing characters in videogames. It's just so boring to do it, and the only thing you really get with doing it is that your favourite bundle of pixels now stays in the same place as you and is 65% less interesting. I can still find the character interesting and maybe cute but yeaaaah it's not really worth it.


(Also making an aroace character in FNV saves space for two perks)

https://redd.it/1q8r7ty
@asexualityonreddit

Gotta be a fellow Ace setting these prices
https://redd.it/1q8q2kg
@asexualityonreddit

The aspec urge to use complex math when explaining something the majority of people inherently understand
https://redd.it/1q8t0w2
@asexualityonreddit