> be malware
> try to be evasive
> "I know! I'll put in backup domains!"
> "I'll also put in fake domains!"
> "It'll be brilliant!"
> "This strategy will bypass everything!"
> Look inside
> 4786 DNS requests

Wow, so subtle bro

I'm so tired of all the Linux larps bro

Nobody gives a fuck that you use Linux. It's just an OS bro.

Want to impress people? Go into the forest with a hatchet and make a computer from dead insects, tree bark, and your feces

I made an intentionally hyperbolic joke poking at all of the Linux posts on social media, some people were not happy about it

Here is what I've learned:
- I'm stuck in the clutches of Windows
- Linux is about freedom, or something
- My Mom
- I don't do anything technical (anymore?)
- People are tired of my whining
- I'm mad
- I'm a Winblows cock sucker
- I'm on a computer

Chat, do NOT tell Linux users to build a computer in the forest with a hatchet.

This is why it's important to NEVER use Linux. Linux is ILLEGAL and for NERDS. Use Windows, enable ALL telemetry, and use Copilot. It's the only safe option.

Telegram nerds, I've decided this Saturday I'm going to make Windows posts and see how Linux users on social media react.

Will they rage? Will they get the joke? It's science

Now we wait and see.

https://x.com/vxunderground/status/2048126003185172890

IT'S AN INSIDER THREAT. HES FROM TELEGRAM

computer virus

Toronto Police launched Project Lighthouse in November, 2025 after police were tipped off about an unknown person(s) operating an SMS Blaster in downtown Toronto.

Watch the video for an actual explanation. The fancy Detective lady gives a run down on what happened.

tl;dr three chinese dudes some how built a custom made portable cell phone tower thingie in a van, drove around toronto with it. peoples cell phones automagically connected it to (its literally a cell phone tower thingie). when a cell phone connected to their portable cell tower thingie it would automatically send the connected phone a text which appeared to be from their bank or somewhere important. they interupted real cell phone towers 13m times lmfao. they were trying to steal passwords and stuff. no details released on how three random nerds managed to do this

Hello,

If you're one of the many little people who lives inside my phone, and enjoy malware, I have good news: I have more malware for you.

The bad news is I forgot to sync the update log. I'll do it tomorrow, maybe later tonight, I don't know.

Pic unrelated

Just got done talking at Georgia Institute of Technology.

I was introduced to a bunch of cybersecurity students as "cybercrime TMZ", a person who "collects pictures of cats", "fills computers with mayonnaise", and discusses things with "Dragon Ball Z" references.

On paper this shit makes me look like a lunatic.

The entire room was dead silent as I vaped and spoke schizophrenic nonsense.

Chat, I DO NOT think they'll be inviting me back

CVE-2026-31431 a/k/a CopyFail

> Linux LPE
> Description sounds like AI slop
> Exploit is legit
> Impacts every Linux kernel from 2017 - Now
> Proof-of-concept released
> It's Wednesday?

https://copy.fail/

One of the most frequent questions I'm asked is "how do you stay up to date on malware stuff?"

Okay, here is a pro tip:

1. Google OTX AlienVault
2. Make account
3. Look at latest
4. Scroll until you find posts from a guy named Petr something-something (has numbers in his name).
4. Follow his account

He monitors all the big malware places and shares the URL, hashes, etc. from malware vendors. I've been following this random ass dude for years and getting updates on everything.

I have no idea who he is. I don't know where he's from. All I know is his setup is absolute fire and he keeps you up to date on literally everything malware related 24/7 365. He also has stuff from vendors in China, Russia, Japan, etc.

Every morning I log into OTX and check up on my boy Petr to see what fire he's bringing me. I love him.

> new cpanel cve thingie
> proof of concept released
> neat
> check on internet degenerates
> tons of united states gov thingies compromised
> tax places compromised
> another day of internet schizophrenia

I've been extremely busy. Haven't been able to malware as much.

Here is what I saw:
- Linux security nerds big angry at some dude named Eric because he has been ignoring security things, or something, I don't know. Some drama about CopyFail and some Android stuff

- cPanel CVE destroying normies, botnets, compromises, spam spamming stuff

- Google not wanting to bug bounty as much because of AI slop. Bug bounty nerds throwing hands everywhere

- A bunch of nerds arguing about the WeezerOSINT guy, saying he's a criminal, others saying he is cool and badass

- A bunch of nerds angry at the Lunduke guy

- Will Dormann going ham sandwich on CopyFail

- More updates on those dorks who were in ALPHV but also cybersecurity negotiation people, they're cooked

- 15 year old arrested for cybercrime in France (stuff with Breached, I guess, I don't know).

- Everyone yapping about Fast16 still

- China tests spooky deep sea oceanic internet cable cutter thingy

- More NPM malware

- Apple Claude md thingie oopsie doopsie

Did I miss anything?

I also got a shit load of DMs but I don't have the willpower to read and reply. Some of you write GIANT messages and it makes my brain hurt (I'm dumb as hell)

Here's the thing no one wants to tell you about AI:

1. It's the worlds largest Python script
2. It runs on Linux, Windows Defender slows it down
3. It uses lots of numbers (nobody knows why)
4. It requires a bunch of GPUs (for gaming)
5. No, you can't have sex with it

Dodge this.

Did your slop Python script accidentally transfer $10,000,000 to a stranger?

Did your vibe coded app accidentally leaked 300,000 peoples phone numbers, e-mail addresses, and passport?

Don't worry, fam. The folks over there at ... Corgi ... now provide AI insurance.