Forwarded from Money/Power/Sneed/Feed
A wealthy old man is being audited, so he goes to the IRS agent’s office with his lawyer to sort it out.
The auditor says “well you say all your wealth comes from gambling, do you have any paper trail to back it up?
The old man replies “no, not really, but I can prove to you I’m a great gambler, are you willing to take a wager?”
The agent agrees.
“I bet you 2,500$ I can bite my eye”
The agent takes the bet, and the old man pops out a glass eye and bites it
The agent is visibly shook and the old man says “okay double or nothing, I bet you I can bite my other eye”
The agent knows he isn’t blind so he takes the bet, the old man takes out his dentures and bites his other eye.
The agent is despondent, he can’t afford to lose five grand, so the old man says “okay, one final bet, $10,000 says I can stand on one side of your desk and piss into the trash can on the other side without a single drop landing on your desk”
The agent knows this has to be impossible, this man is ancient, his prostate must be shot, there’s no way and sure enough the old man pisses all over his desk.
The agent jumps up laughing a cheering, but he sees the lawyer shaking his head with his face in his hands.
“What’s the matter?” The agent asks
The lawyer replies “before we walked in here he bet me fifty grand he could piss all over your desk and have you be happy about it”
ObtainerOf / 𝕏
The auditor says “well you say all your wealth comes from gambling, do you have any paper trail to back it up?
The old man replies “no, not really, but I can prove to you I’m a great gambler, are you willing to take a wager?”
The agent agrees.
“I bet you 2,500$ I can bite my eye”
The agent takes the bet, and the old man pops out a glass eye and bites it
The agent is visibly shook and the old man says “okay double or nothing, I bet you I can bite my other eye”
The agent knows he isn’t blind so he takes the bet, the old man takes out his dentures and bites his other eye.
The agent is despondent, he can’t afford to lose five grand, so the old man says “okay, one final bet, $10,000 says I can stand on one side of your desk and piss into the trash can on the other side without a single drop landing on your desk”
The agent knows this has to be impossible, this man is ancient, his prostate must be shot, there’s no way and sure enough the old man pisses all over his desk.
The agent jumps up laughing a cheering, but he sees the lawyer shaking his head with his face in his hands.
“What’s the matter?” The agent asks
The lawyer replies “before we walked in here he bet me fifty grand he could piss all over your desk and have you be happy about it”
ObtainerOf / 𝕏
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Forwarded from Police frequency
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In Other News: A man brought a full-size harp to the riverbank in Pittsburgh's Point State Park before disrobing and jumping in the river, prompting a police/EMS response, per Pittsburgh Public Safety.
PD is investigating if the man, who was hospitalized, is the harp's rightful owner.
Ricky Sayer
PD is investigating if the man, who was hospitalized, is the harp's rightful owner.
Ricky Sayer
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Forwarded from 🌲 john societycorn must die 🎅
What da hell is going on in Pittsburgh dawg
Forwarded from The Porkchop Express
Rerum Novarum // Intel, Breaking News, and Alerts 🇺🇸
🇺🇸⚡️- ICE launched an immigration enforcement operation today in Maine, titled “Operation Catch of the Day.” The operation began in Maine’s greater Portland area, where up to 50 illegal immigrants were arrested. ICE Deputy Assistant Director Patricia Hyde…
This dumb orange nigger is now concerned about the optics of mass deportations after he just went to Davos and called Somalians retarded and confused Greenland with Iceland multiple times
Forwarded from The Porkchop Express
They’re going back Donny boy so get over it FAGGOT!
Forwarded from 🌲 john societycorn must die 🎅
When I was 3 my dad lied to me and told me Disneyland wasn't a real place, just something they show on TV and I believed him so I never wanted to go again after that. If you have young kids and they say they want to go to Disneyland, lie to them. This is financial advice
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Forwarded from LiveLeak
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WARNING: GRAPHIC FOOTAGE
🇺🇸 Fort Lauderdale, Florida — Police are offering a reward of up to $5,000 for information that could help identify a child who allegedly beat a duck to death.
Surveillance footage shows the child chasing the duck near a home and pinning it to the ground. Investigators say the child stomped on the animal until it died before fleeing the scene.
Follow us -> LiveLeak
🇺🇸 Fort Lauderdale, Florida — Police are offering a reward of up to $5,000 for information that could help identify a child who allegedly beat a duck to death.
Surveillance footage shows the child chasing the duck near a home and pinning it to the ground. Investigators say the child stomped on the animal until it died before fleeing the scene.
Follow us -> LiveLeak
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